team - C.E. Lemieux Jr

November 7, 2021November 7, 2021

Small Acts, Big Memories

Sometimes I struggle for something to say here. Other times the thoughts just pop into my head. In this case, I saw a name, and that name caused my mind to travel back in time, some forty-six years. It was a memory, the kind that just seems to wipe out all the other stuff around it. But first, a little background.

It was 1974 when I attended my first live football game. We’d lived all over the country, but other than watching football on TV with my dad. I’d never even seen a football field until we moved to that small Oklahoma town. I immediately loved the game, though I’ll admit I was never that great at playing it. Still, something about those pads and the helmet, a jersey with your number on it, battling up and down the field in the grass and the mud. It was just cool.

March 2, 2019March 2, 2019

Winners Don’t Always Win

03/09/2015

I recently had the incredible privilege of watching a group of young athletes pour out every ounce of courage and determination they possessed upon the basketball court. We watched our girls battle in the area tournament, where they felt the pain of loss wipe out their hopes for a trip to the state tournament. Of course they were disappointed at their loss, but happy for the boys who were going on to the Oklahoma Class B State Tournament.

The trip for the boys was a tough, long battle. Ranked number four going in, the defending state champions, who had previously trounced over their opponents, had to work every second of nearly every game to earn their place at state. Those young men had seriously worked their tails off to get there. They battled through games that some people, including myself, weren’t sure they were going to win. Winning by a few hard fought points in most cases, they worked their way through the District, Regional, and Area tournaments to make it to the three day state bracket.

The fight wasn’t over there. They had to battle their way through the first two games of the tournament, knocking off the number two and number three ranked teams, to make it to that cherished place in the final game and face the number one ranked team in the state. Again, hard earned points separated them from their opponents. I’m sure they left a trail of disappointment behind them with the teams they beat. Sometimes it is even harder to take the loss by a few points than it is to be blown out. A blow out can easily be explained by realizing they played a stronger team. Losing by a few points always leaves doubts and thoughts of what could have been pooling in the mind.

In a championship game that went back and forth, leaving hope hanging in the air, they struggled. Just as in the previous games, they played a team with a deeper, more experienced bench. With time outs, breaks between quarters, halftime, and a couple of substitutes (I was proud to see my son out there) as their only relief, five determined young men pounded up and down the court. They absolutely left everything they had on the court. They were worn and exhausted, but driven by adrenaline and hope.

Their coach too put all he could into the game. He gave them his best advice, his best words, and as much encouragement as he could. He sacrificed timeouts just to give them a breather. He showed respect for their courage and their drive. Their fans cheered and screamed and wrung their hands. The anticipation hung throughout the game. It’s a small team, from a small town, so they had the whole town behind them.

But in the end, they didn’t win. They accepted the silver, with an ache for the gold. They did their best to take pictures with family and friends even though their hearts wanted to slink away and cry out the pain. Just as they had won their way there, they lost by a few mere points and that’s heartbreaking. Some of them were seniors and they saw their dream slip away. Others still have other seasons ahead of them, but wonder if they’ll have the opportunity to be there again.

They learned a very hard lesson, one they may not appreciate for a long time and may never look fondly upon: Winners Don’t Always Win. They, of course, are winners. They proved it all along the way. They won because they put their hearts and their efforts on the line. They won because they gave it their all. They won because they left a trail of successful challenges behind them. They won because they have the respect of their coaches for the effort. They won because they will always be winners to the family and friends who love and support them. They won because they inspired a sense of pride for a small town, and they served as examples for all the little athletes who look up to them. They won because they were there.

But my friends, winners don’t always win every challenge. What makes them winners is the character and determination they have to make it through to the other side, even if it hurts. The ache of loss is always there ready to raise its ugly head in moments of reminiscence. There will be “what if’s” that follow them whenever they think back on that season or that game. But when they look back with honesty, and they feel how hard the pain of that loss hit them, they’ll realize that they wouldn’t feel that way if they hadn’t wanted it so badly. If you can walk away without the pain, you simply didn’t want it enough. But if the pain nearly tears you apart, if your heart aches every time you think about it, you know your heart was in the right place and you know you gave it your all.

No, winners don’t always win, but real winners always rise to the top, even if they lose. Thanks for the season, guys!

March 2, 2019March 2, 2019

Negative Nelly

09/16/2013

Recently, I’ve been giving my son a hard time about his pessimism. It’s really easy to see why he’s had a hard time with it. Just a few short weeks into baseball season, and as he was really getting excited about playing the game again, he suffered a broken leg on a slide into third base. He had made new friends on the team and was enjoying not just the game, but also the camaraderie of the relationships he was developing. All that appeared to be coming to an end with the broken leg.

As he went through the healing process, little changes and feelings he hadn’t experienced before seemed to make him think things were going worse instead of getting better. The darkness in the foot and the continued swelling caused him to question if it was healing, even though the doctor said it was going well. After one particular visit to the doctor, when he’d been worried the leg wasn’t healing correctly, I texted him, calling him Negative Nelly repeatedly to rouse him from his pessimism.

He did make it to some of the baseball games in an effort to let the team know he was still supporting them and those moments seemed to lift his spirits. Then the prognosis of extended time before he would be able to get back to normal pulled him back down. Stuck in his room keeping the leg up, he kind of became a recluse and didn’t interact with the family much

This year we didn’t have enough players for a football team, an incredibly depressing thought for a team which had played for the state championship the previous year. We cooperated with a neighboring town, and he had hopes of playing with them. Even though he knew he wouldn’t start the season, he participated in practices and team get-togethers, again to show support for the team, and I think to make himself feel better about things.

On his last visit to the doctor, he was under the impression he would be able to play in just a few weeks. But after meeting with the physical therapist, his hopes were dashed again as he found out how long the actual recovery would take.

All of these things seemed to pile up, and he had taken on a bit of a negative attitude about things. He seemed to focus on the bad news rather than the good. Again, an easy pit to fall into when you are young and things don’t seem to be going your way.

But he’s not alone. It’s often easy to let life’s little obstacles rob us of our positive outlook. As adults, sometimes we fall into the spin cycle of negativity and can’t seem to get out. Financial hardships, health issues, the daily grind… they all seem to suck the life and energy out of us.

However, there are those among us who somehow are able to skip over the negativity and always focus on the positive. They are amazing people, and I often wonder if they really never get down or they just find a way to pull out of it before anyone notices. Either way, it is an admirable trait, to be able to face the world looking through those rose colored glasses and stay perpetually on the upside of things. However, many of us have to work a little harder to stay on the up and up.

One way to keep things in focus is to remember that as bad as things seem, “this too shall pass.” Even though my son’s leg was broken, it will heal, and in the long run he will be better for the experience. He will learn from it and he will see that he can push through it.

Another way to overcome those moments of negativity is to count your blessings. A little over a year ago, my son… along with the rest of his family…had lost his home. We faced something we had never expected. It is a suddenly overwhelming experience to be without all with which you are familiar. But with a great amount of support, we weathered it and we were brought to a place where we could see what was really important in our lives. Even with the loss, we had some wonderful things for which we could be thankful.

Perhaps, our negativity is the result of a bad decision or a mistake. If so, we need to recognize we all make mistakes and avoid continued punishment. We must make the decision to learn from the mistake and move on. We can’t allow it to continue to eat away at our confidence or energy levels. The more time we devote to dwelling on it, the more time is lost for moving to a more positive frame of mind.

When faced with the negative, we can stop our thought patterns and redirect our focus. Forcing ourselves to think about other things, occupying our minds with other thoughts can help us to overcome that pulling of our souls into the darkness. Surrounding ourselves with positive thinkers can help as well. Whatever it takes, we can pull it off. We can avoid being a Negative Nelly or a Pessimistic Paul by looking for what’s right or good with our lives. We can look forward to the time when we heal and become stronger than we were because of the experience.