The Mask

I usually try to have a couple posts at hand in the event I don’t have time to put something together. I’ve been a little behind lately, so I pulled this one out. It was written well before the recent Covid-19 issues. Current events put a little different spin on it.

I had a conversation with one of my sons about the impact of social media on personality. He was listening to a podcast which discussed how an individual’s “in person” personality differed from their “social media” personality. It reminded me of a quote from the movie The Mask. It was a quote which got a lot of play in our household at the time.

“That’s correct, Wendy. We all wear masks, metaphorically speaking.” — Dr. Arthur Neuman (Ben Stein)

In many ways, social media has become a mask for some of us. As I mentioned before, I’d like to keep this blog free from political bias as much as I humanly can. I’m here to talk about my books, words, stories, and life. But when we talk about words and their impact, there is no denying social media has certainly had an impact upon the way our society uses words and speech. Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and a host of other platforms give voice to reach the world. Buying your own website, as I have done, allows freedom of speech and an audience once unknown or unimaginable.

In a previous blog, I shared my reflections of watching the interactions of men with different political, religious, ethnic, career, and personal persuasions. They clearly differed in their positions or opinions, but they didn’t hold those differences as weapons against each other. That’s something which rarely happens in the social media controlled world we live in today.

Social media has had a profound affect upon the way we use our words. The distance and the anonymity which social media has created between individuals has made it easier to attack each other. Words which would never have been used face to face, from a position of common courtesy or respect, are thrown out with the force of a rocket. Mild mannered individuals are spurred to vent their frustrations. Introverts become online extroverts. Differences become societal emergencies. Words become weapons, or worse the impetus to use weapons and violence. People with different opinions become enemies, and the cause becomes justification for the anger.

Because of the internet, individuals who would consider themselves as introverts in public, suddenly find a voice on social media. I understand. I am one of those people who find more comfort in the written word than in the public or social interaction. However, one of the reasons I care for the written word is because it allows me time for thought. Words, sentences, and concepts in this article will be rethought and rewritten multiple times before I get the courage to share them. Social media has shown itself to be an encouragement to respond without thought.

Spontaneous interactions, social conversation, and causal encounters give cause to speak and release emotions we would normally work though. Because of its limits and relative distance, it creates greater opportunity for miscommunication. We’ve all responded at some time in a way we later found to regret with proper reflection. Social media has made that even easier.

While some people are more alive in a public or social environment, others are not. Social media has given voice to those who felt they had none. We see people rant, air their family’s dirty laundry, complain, tell others how they’ve been mistreated, and use social media as a way to bring attention unto themselves. In fact, Twitter’s entire point of being is to encourage users to spit out the first thing that comes to mind and keep it under one hundred and forty characters; something with which I have tremendous difficulty.

Another change social media has encouraged into our society is divisiveness. I’m not talking about the divisiveness between segments of society; I’m talking about differences reflected in personal interactions, in community. Before social media — when we only spoke with those with whom we worked, or interacted with people on a person to person and daily basis — we did what we could to get along. We had our opinions, but we knew others did as well. We shared space with people who might not have been just like us; we maintained decorum and a sense of community. But now, with the advancement of the internet and social media, we can retreat to a corner where everyone is the same as us. We can find others out there who think like us, and we don’t have to live among those with whom we disagree. It encourages us to disregard all those things which allowed us to function as a civil society.

Politicians and politically motivated organizations use social media as a tool to promote their ideas, beliefs, and grow their numbers. It feeds the growing divide in society. Words are used on multiple sides of the issues to both inflame the emotions of supporters and characterize the opposition in negative ways. Words are spun so fast that sometimes we can’t even tell what is true and what is not.

Of course, for all of it’s potential evils, social media has its benefits. Family and friends unite, sharing news and photos over the internet. We sometimes gain new friends. It allows those who are shut-in to reach out and find comfort. Some people find out that they are not alone. It allows groups and communities an avenue of communication. Those in need can find support groups and chat. We can more easily rally around a worthy cause. We even raise money for charity and special causes through this digital word of mouth. We support our schools and students on our pages, tweets, and posts. We promote our businesses and our book blogs over social media. We share passions, art, and thought.

When it comes down to it, it isn’t social media that has changed society, it is how we use it. We alone hold ownership of our words. Social media may feel like a mask, but it isn’t. Social media may empower our speech, but we are the ones speaking. We may use Facebook and Twitter to say what we want, but we decide how we say it, how we use the words, and whether or not we choose to hurt or heal with them. We have freedom of speech, but we also have a burden of responsibility. It’s tough, especially when we feel we have a moral obligation to speak out, but we don’t win the conversation by destroying the audience. We still live on this little green and blue ball in a small section of the universe — together.

“Words: So innocent and powerless as they are, as standing in a dictionary, how potent for good and evil they become in the hands of one who knows how to combine them” — Nathaniel Hawthorne

“The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” — Proverbs 18:21

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

2012

“A picture is worth a thousand words.”  Really?  We’ve heard that one time and again, but is it true?  Of course in some ways a picture can convey things that may take many words to describe, but then again there is an immense amount of power in words or even in a single word.  If I offered the word “frigid” what images would it conjure within your mind?  Perhaps your imagination would take over and leave you with an image of snow being whipped by a winter wind.  Maybe your mind pictures a large, cold block of ice.  In some cases, one might suddenly see the profile of a particularly uppity individual?  Possibly it would send chills through your body and cause you to imagine sitting inside near the fire while that previously mentioned snowstorm rages outside your living room window.  One word that can send so many different messages to your brain; amazing isn’t it?

Not long ago I attempted to enter the Twitter age.  As I’m not big conversationalist, I spend more time reading the tweets of others than I do sending out my own tweets out into the world.  As I checked Twitter, I saw a tweet from Karen DeLabar.  Karen is one of many people I follow on Twitter.  Along with Susan Borath, Karen runs a site called Writing on the Rocks.  Writing on the Rocks is a book review site.  You can check it out at http://writingontherocks.com.

Karen’s tweet was: “What would you do-oo-ooo for a Klondike bar?”  Pretty simple, huh?  We’ve all heard the jingle thousands of times.  The next thing I know, I’ve got that jingle on my mind for hours.  I find myself whistling it at work.  Soon others have the same jingle on their minds.  You know how it goes; you play it over in your mind until it actually begins to aggravate you that you can’t get it off your mind.  After hours of trying to remove it from my thoughts, I had to tweet Karen back and thank her for offering that particular tweet.

But later on, I started to think about that jingle.  Karen didn’t hum it for me.  She didn’t send me a YouTube video of someone jumping up and down on a busy street to get a Klondike bar.  She merely tweeted a few simple words and the music immediately started playing in my head.  That’s the power of words.  They can bring to mind sounds, tastes, emotions, scents, or textures.  Writers use words to paint beautiful pictures, convey the feelings of their characters, or transport you to places you’ve never been.  The writer of that jingle used words to bring attention to the product.  You might think of a cool, creamy dessert or a polar bear like the one on the package.  You might think of people doing outrageous things to earn one of those tasty treats.

Words move us; they motivate us and they touch us.  They make us laugh out loud at stupid elephant jokes.  They bring a lump to our throats or tears to our eyes as they convey heartbreak.  They may cause our heart to race as we remember that first tender, touch of a kiss.  Words fill us with apprehension as the villain sneaks up on the hero.  Those words, along with the imaginative power of the human mind, allow us to experience and re-experience.

The mind is a powerful instrument, and it can take something as simple as a word and create images or trigger memories.  In my book, Loving Deacon, Emily’s words are powerful enough to change a man’s feelings and perspective.  By reminding Deacon of his role in the relationship; by helping him bring to the surface old memories; she leads him towards the discovery of the treasure which had remained elusive throughout their life together.

“What a marvelous thing exists in the human mind? It has the ability to block out entire segments of time, moments of pain which could otherwise torture the soul of an individual. It compiles and retains intricate pieces of information, and can recall them in their entirety… to the most infinite detail… triggering warm feelings which overwhelm the senses. Its information processing can involve the other senses in a way we can remember the sounds of a moment, the smells of an event, or the images of a person. When all other material or physical reminders are lost to us, we rely on our minds to bring them back again.” – Loving Deacon Our words impact others; whether it is in a creative work such as a book or a poem or in our personal conversations.  Tone and context change how a word is perceived.  We have the ability to make people feel good or bad with our words.  We can brighten a day with something as simple as “Hello.”  Use the power of your words to make a difference.  Say something silly or enlightening.  Bring a truth to light.  Tell a tale.  Remember that one word could be worth a thousand pictures, a million images, a multitude of sensations, or a myriad of emotions.

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